After the Fact
by GreasyGlider
Summary: Ponyboy's life continues. He grows away from the gang, Dates Cathy Carlson of That was then this is now and gets into trouble. formerly known as the ups and downs
1. Chapter 1: Cathy Carlson

It was lunchtime, the bell rang and almost half the students rushed down to the cafeteria. The other half made their way out to the parking lot to drive down to The Dingo and get their lunch there. I didn't have a car so I trotted on down to the cafeteria with Curly Shepard and Richard Wilson.

"Ya here about Jennings?" Wilson asked Curly.

Curly began laughing and uttered "Yeah, that punk had it coming after what he did to Angela. Dirty little shit"

"Mark Jennings?" I asked

Curly nodded. "He got thrown in the reformatory the other night--Drugs. The punk was selling 'em to kids, and hippies and stuff"

That bothered me. Mark Jennings was a good guy. I knew he was a little rough, probably wasn't too honest either but I didn't know he was into drugs.

"Well how's old Douglas taking it?" I asked. Mark lived with Bryon Douglas and they were as close as brothers.

"Pretty damn good I suppose" Curly said "He's the one that turned him in. His chick, Whats-her-face Carlson, has a brother that was on a pretty bad acid trip--I reckon thats why Bryon turned Jennings in" he said in a deep voice.

I was pretty confused by now. Bryon's girlfriend Cathy Carlson sure was a nice girl, pretty outspoken too. I asked her out on a date one time, but she said she was busy. I think that was when she got pretty serious with Douglas, so I didn't bother to call her again. I hardly understood what her kid brother had to do with Mark selling drugs.

"How's Cathy taking it?" I asked

"No one knows for sure. She's been outta school for a whole week. I heard Douglas broke it off with her. She should be back Monday" Wilson said.

After school I went straight home. Two-Bit was asleep on our couch, and Soda and Darry were watching TV.

"Hey Soda?" I asked him

"What Pony?"

"When did you get your first girlfriend?"

"6th Grade. Why do you ask?"

"Well.. there's this girl... Cathy.. and--" Two-Bit interrupted me.

"It aint my Kathy is it?"

"Hell no, Two-Bit. You know i'd never steal your chick"

He just shrugged and went back to sleep.

"Soda, This girl Cathy, I like her alot and she's going through a really rough time right now. I think she just broke up with her boyfriend, and I like her a lot. How long should I wait to um... Ya know?"

He smiled at me. I knew it was because we both knew this is one of the only subjects old Soda could help me out on. He liked to feel smart about something for once.

"Well, buddy, maybe wait a couple weeks. As soon as she looks happy for once, maybe when she starts to shut up about him. Just talk to her first, become her friend." He said.

I nodded and thought about that for a minute. I liked Cathy a lot, but we hardly knew each other. I knew she was beautiful, and wasn't afraid to voice her opinion but not much else.


	2. Chapter 2: M&M Carlson

The next day at school I bumped into Cathy in the halls. I was too afraid to say anything so I just waved at her and thought about her the rest of the day up until lunch. At lunch time, I saw her sitting alone, with this sad, sensitive look on her face. I sat next to her.

"H-hi Cathy." I said.

"Hey Ponyboy. How ya doin?"

"Good. I hear you're going through a pretty rough time right now. how are you doing?" I didn't want to ask that. I was just so curious, I was afraid she might start bawling or something, but she just stared at me for a moment.

"Yeah, I guess everyone's heard my little story by now. Well I guess I'm doing a little bit better. My brother just got out of the hospital but he still isn't himself, and Bryon broke up with me. About as bad as it gets, but I'm surviving." She said. She looked at me with this hurt sad look in her eyes, and I couldn't help but feel terrible for her.

"I know what it's like to lose people." I said, I didn't want to sound to corny it just had to be said. She nodded at me and the expression in her eyes didn't change.

"You wanna call me sometime?" I asked her. I could feel my face getting hot and I knew I was probably blushing. She just smiled at me and nodded and I gave my phone number to her.

"I'll call tomorrow." She said, still smiling.

After school, I decided to take the long way home. Sometimes I just need more time for myself. It was only a half a mile longer anyway. I was walking down the road as I walked further, I heard this strange yelling and screaming. The farther I walked, the louder I heard it. I started running to see what the trouble was, It was coming from the DX. When I got to the DX I didn't see anything, so I circled the DX, and in the back I saw some tough looking hood with long red hair, and a cowboy-looking kid with black hair and brown eyes beating the hell out of this kid who couldn't have been more than 14. I suddenly got a recollection of the time I was jumped by the socs on my way home from the movies, the thought of it made me go red and I grabbed my knife from out of my pocket and flipped it open.

"Hey! You let him go you damn hoods!" I said. I was sounding a little bit too confident than I should have been but I hated to see kids getting beat up. The kid was crying and he had a strange fearful look in his big gray eyes. He looked kind of familiar, but I had never seen him before. The guy with red hair pulled out a switchblade.

"I aint letting go of this kid. He's a smartass and I'm gonna teach him a lesson."

"Well he may be, but that aint no reason, now let him go, or there'll be trouble!" I said. I was awful scared, the red headed guy was a pretty big guy, he seemed to be pretty tough too. The cowboy-looking kid tackled me and I didn't know what to do. The red-headed guy still was kicking the tar out of that kid with gray eyes. The semi-cowboy was wrestling me and he pulled out his knife and cut my arm up pretty bad. I punched him in the stomach and knocked the wind out of him and that kept him down for a minute, I got up and tried to grab the poor kid that was being jumped till the red head guy tripped me and I heard a voice, it was a familiar one too.

"Alright, Russel, Jimmy, get the hell out of here." It was Tim Shepard. I looked up at him and he looked so tough with his hair messed up and he wasn't the biggest guy but he scared those hoods. They ran off. I looked to see how the kid they were beating up was and he was sobbing. After that Tim just got up and left. That was a lot like Tim, he would help you if you needed it but he didn't get too involved.

"You alright buddy?" I asked him.

"No... I- I- Thanks... those guys were following me, I just wanted to get a coke, and they were chasing me. I tried to get away but they..." The kid was crying bad. There was a lot of dust in his long black hair and he looked really sick.

"Need me to take ya home?" I asked him. He just nodded while still sobbing and I walked him to his house. He was telling me all about his deathly fear of spiders and how everyone was telling them they aren't real. He was a weird guy, but I figure he just couldn't think straight since he was so beat up. When we finally got to his house he was crying uncontrollably. I knocked on the door and was awful surprised of who answered it. Cathy Carlson.

"M&M? Where have you been?!" She asked the kid. She was hugging him and seemed real relieved.

"I-I just wanted to get a coke... but... these spiders were..." he began.

"Sweetie, what really happened?" She asked him.

"Some tough punks were beating the tar out of him." I told her.

"This your little brother?" I asked her. She nodded.

"Thank you so much, Pony" She said.

"Come on in." She said to me.

"Nah, I'm okay." I said

"No really come in."

I came in and there were all these little kids in there that looked a lot like Cathy in there. I should've known the kid was Cathy's brother. They look like twins. Her brother, I think his name was M&M was laying down on the couch next to his mother. She looked awful worried and asked Cathy what happened to the poor kid.

"These hoods were attacking him. This guy right here, Ponyboy rescued him" She said. She looked at me with her big eyes and instead of sadness they were eyes of gratitude now.

"It was nothin.. I got beat up once when I was a kid... I didn't wanna see that happen to this hear kid."

"Thank you so much, Ponyboy, is it?" She asked. Mrs. Carlson was a real nice lady and she had the same smile as Cathy. I nodded.

"That's a nice name" She said. M&M was still sobbing and I felt real bad for the kid. Cathy invited me to watch TV with her, But I said I had to go.

"Call me tomorrow?" She asked me.

"Sure thing" I said.

I liked Cathy a lot, and now I was sure she liked me.


	3. Chapter 3: The phonecall

The next day I went down to the DX to chat with Steve.

"Hey Pony" Steve said, talking to me like I was a human instead of a little baby like he used to.

"How's it going Steve?"

"Not so good" he said while waxing an old car.

" Well, Why?"

"Evie broke It off with me last night" he said. He had a real mellow, sad tone to his voice also. Nothing like the Steve I knew.

"Gee, that's too bad. I always thought you guys would wind up married" I said trying to sound sincere.

"Yeah. She's been hanging out with Curly. I swear I'm gonna kill that guy one day" Steve said. His tone of voice shifted from mellow to bitter. I decided to change the subject.

"Ya seen Two-Bit around here today?" I asked.

"Nah, I think he said something about going over to Buck's last night though." I usually wasn't allowed at Buck's but I had just turned 16, and Darry was being a lot more reasonable now. Buck's was an awful long walk so Steve let me borrow his truck. It was only a 3-minute drive or so.

When I got there Two-Bit was hanging outside Buck's having a smoke with Tim Shepard.

"Hey Two-Bit, Tim." I said.

"Hey Kid." Tim said in his calm quiet yet tough voice.

" How goes it Pony?" Two-Bit asked me.

" 'Bout as good as it gets" I said calmly.

"You wanna come to Rusty's party? Should be a real good one." Two-Bit said.

"Nah, I don't know if Dar would go for that one. Plus I might have a date tonight" I said thinking of Cathy.

"Well I might stop by your house around midnight if I'm drunk. Make sure to warn Darry" Two-Bit said jokingly.

"Yeah, Sure thing" I said. I dropped Steve's truck off at the DX and went on home. Darry was on the phone with his new girlfriend, Annette. Neither me or Soda have met her yet, we don't know much about her either. Darry sure seems to like her a lot though.

"Come on Darry" I said " There are other people that need to use the phone too" I said trying not to sound too mouthy. He just looked up at me and stuck one finger up motioning "1 more minute" So I just grabbed a book and read for his "One Minute" Which felt more like 3 hours. When he finally got off the phone I called up Cathy. The phone rang for a minute.

"Hello?" it was her kid brother M&M who answered the phone.

"Hey buddy, it's me Ponyboy. Can I talk to Cathy?"

"Oh Hey. Yeah here she is." The kid still sounded a little messed up. Drugs do that to ya. Especially LSD.

"Hello?" It was Cathy.

"Hey it's me, Ponyboy. Do you have any plans for tonight?" I asked. I felt my face go red and I felt like I had a fever, I only felt that way for one moment though, then it all went away when Cathy said No.

"Well, would you like to go to a movie or something with me?"

"Sure, it has to be after six o'clock though. M&M has a doctor's appointment and I have to baby sit all these kids until six." She said with laughter, and sarcasm in her voice.

"Well is 7 okay?" I asked. I hoped my voice didn't sound too desperate.

"Yeah 7 will be fine." She said. We said bye and I felt real happy. So happy I took a shower and put on some of Darry's cologne.


	4. Chapter 4: The Date

I picked Cathy up at seven sharp. Two-Bit let me use his car, I was a little embarrassed of that hunk of junk though. I knocked on the door and a little girl with black hair and gray eyes answered it. It's amazing how much they all look alike.

"Is Cathy here?" I asked the little girl. She seemed to think for a minute till she said.

"I think she's getting ready. Where's Bryon?" She asked. This is about the worst question she could ask me and I tried to handle it best I could.

"Well I don't know where he is, but Cathy is going to spend a little bit of time with me tonight." I tried to explain. The kid just nodded and grabbed Cathy. Cathy sure looked pretty. She didn't do much with her hair but it still looked beautiful just down, and straight. She wore the perfect amount of make-up too.

"You sure look nice" I said sincerely. She thanked me and I took her out to the car. I opened the door for her to be polite.

"Thank you" she began "Bryon—he never did anything like that. Thanks a lot Pony" I didn't know what to say so I just nodded.

"What movie are we gonna see?"

"I don't know I think they're playing _Psycho _down at the admiral twin. It's a few years old, and it's in black and white. Have you seen it?"

"Nope. I heard it's pretty scary though" She said smiling at me.

"It's not so bad" I said "Really. I saw it when I was 7 or 8. It's not that scary"

"Great." She said.

I always dreaded going to the Admiral Twin. Brings back too many memories. But, I wanted this to be a happy night so I tried my best not to think about that night with Dallas, and Johnny, Cherry and Marcia, and Two-Bit. I blocked that out of my mind best I could.

Some hippie kid sold us our tickets and we got some coke and popcorn. I was awful curious about her brother and asked her how he was doing. She got this sick expression on her face and said

"Well, we still don't know what's gonna happen to M&M. He may become him old self again, or he may have lost his mind forever. He was such a sweet kid, though" She said trying to hold back the tears. "I don't know if I would be able to take it if he lost his beautiful mind." I was afraid she'd cry and she was about to. Luckily, she held back the tears.

"Well, a lot of crazy things can happen in this town. Especially now days. I'm sure he'll be fine" I said trying to sound sincere. She just stared at the ground and I was hoping the rest of the date would go better.

After Psycho started Cathy was hardly sad at all. In fact it hardly even scared her, up until the shower scene that is. She cuddled against me acting really scared and like a fool I just watched the scene. That was a really artsy scene for me, I noticed something new about it every time I saw it. Anyway, so Cathy was all cuddled up against me, and I put my arm around her. After the shower scene she kissed me just out of the blue. I was really surprised.

"What was that for?" I asked absentmindedly

" You're the nicest guy I've met in awhile" she began. " I want to see you again. You're the only thing that keeps me from thinking about Bryon. But I feel much better around you than I did him." She said. I didn't know what to say so I just said thanks. I didn't have much experience with girls, but I was having a hell of a time with Cathy.


	5. Chapter 5: After the date

After the movie it was only 9. Cathy had a curfew though, it was ten, so I just brought her on home with me. The drive was pretty silent, we just had some small talk and that was it. When I got home, Two-Bit was watching TV, and Darry was talking to Soda about something.

"Hey y'all" I said

"How goes it PonyMan?" Two-Bit asked me jokingly.

"Hey Pony" Soda greeted me.

"This is Cathy. My date." I said.

"Errr … you sure can pick the cute ones out there, Pony" Two-Bit said. That embarrassed me and I looked at Cathy to see if she was embarrassed. Luckily, she was laughing.

"Lay off, Two-Bit."

"So how was the date?" Darry asked.

"Pretty good. We went down to the admiral twin and I'm dropping Cathy off in a few minutes"

" Did he treat ya like a lady?" Soda asked, half joking, half serious

"Oh yeah, sure did. I'll tell ya he knows how to treat a girl. With my last boyfriend I always felt like—Oops… hah, sorry. It's just that."

"Don't worry about it." I said. It didn't bug me too bad but I was feeling a little jealous.

"So are you all brothers?" Cathy asked me. I just noticed that I hadn't really introduced anyone yet.

"The bum watching TV isn't" I said jokingly.

"'Ey! Watch it!" Two-Bit said cocking up that eyebrow.

" The big guy over there is Darry. He's my oldest brother. And the movie star's Sodapop. " I was getting in the habit of calling Soda "Movie Star" He didn't seem to mind it much either. I was afraid of what she was gonna ask next, and I had a bad feeling she was gonna ask it.

And sure enough Cathy asked: "Where's your parents?" Darry didn't seem to mind but Soda got a sick look on his face.

"They've been gone for awhile" I explained. "Car wreck" She looked real embarrassed and the expression on Soda's face went from worried and sick to careless and happy.

"I'm… real sorry." She said.

"Nah, it's okay. We get asked that a lot" I lied. Mostly everyone knew about us since the whole experience last year, but she was fairly knew and was still trying to figure things out. I think she lived out here before, but I never noticed her.

"So what made ya wanna get together with old PonyMan here?" Two-Bit asked. Sometimes I wished he would just shut up.

"Haha, No." Cathy explained. "He asked me out. I was just smart enough to enjoy it" then she flashed me this giant grin and I thought I was gonna blush. Luckily, I kept it cool.

"Well, I better be getting Cathy home. See you guys in a minute."

The drive was a bit different than the one before. We were a lot more comfortable with each other, and I could actually use my brain.

" How long you been out here?" I asked her.

"I've lived in Tulsa since I was six. When I was eleven, I went away to school. Early last summer I came back though, I guess I was too homesick" I kinda wondered if she was lying but just forgot about it.

"How long you lived out here?" She asked me.

"Basically all my life." I explained. "When I was real little we lived out in the country, but when I turned two we moved out here. And guess we liked it pretty well and stayed here" I explained.

"I hear things were different while I was away" Cathy said. "Were they?"

"Well of course there weren't too many hippies. But I don't know if you remember it from when you were eleven, but all the richer kids like Rob Larsen beat up all us poorer kids like my family and Two-Bit" I explained. "It was a really big mess and I even lost a couple friends over it, and when I say lost I mean they were… I mean they died. Anyway, after awhile it all died down a little and 'Greasers' and 'Socs' were out and 'Hippies' were in. I've managed to stay somewhat a greaser, it aint the same as it was, but I'm no hippie."

" I wish Greasers and Socs were back in" She said as her tone of voice slowly got sadder and sadder " M&M is a hippie. Hell, if he wasn't he wouldn't have gotten into that damn free love house and lost his mind forever" She was crying real hard by now. And she put her head down on my shoulder.

"Hey it'll be alright. You don't know he's lost his mind forever"

"Well it's more than likely. You might think he's a weirdo now and I wouldn't blame you, but back before all this shit he was the sweetest kid in the whole world. He couldn't stand fighting. He acted like an adult half the time. He never got into any trouble but now… now he's not a person. He's a drug. He still thinks that spiders are going to attack him, he always hears all these colors screaming at him… I don't know what to make of it and I can't—" she was really upset and I was holding her tight. "I can't take it" she whispered. "I'm sorry for dumping this on you Ponyboy, I'm probably not too much fun. This is just really hard for me. And I need someone to talk to"

"I know how hard it is to lose people" I began "Hell last year, I lost my parents, my best friend Johnny, and my buddy Dallas."

"How'd they… die? Johnny and Dallas, I mean… I'm sorry if you don't wanna talk about it but—" I stopped her.

" You see, this soc, he was drowning me. Johnny saved my life by stabbing the guy. I know it sounds harsh but not much else could be done." I froze. I hadn't talked about Johnny for a long time and it was getting harder and harder. "I—I we had to hide out in this abandoned church" My voice was shaking and I was afraid I was going to start crying. " Once we stepped out of that church and got back in, it was on fire." I wiped the tears from my face and went on " And there were a bunch of kids inside there—they were having a field trip or something… and I ran off to save them—Johnny, he came to help me out. I made it out okay… he didn't though." I tried my best to stop crying, I didn't wanna be seen as a wuss to Cathy. "After a few weeks he died. My friend Dallas was a real rough guy, Johnny was his only, it was the only thing he cared about. Later that night Dallas got himself shot by the cops… and that's it"

"That's awful Pony" She said. "That's terrible and I'm sorry. I had no idea your life was so—so terrible'

"It aint so bad" I said. By now I had stopped crying.

I dropped Cathy off at her house and she kissed me, the kiss lasted for like 20 seconds too.

"Call me tomorrow" she said. And I knew I would


	6. Chapter 6: A bad taste of Curly

I couldn't go to sleep last night. All these horrible things were running through my mind. I was thinking about Johnny, Dally, Cathy, Soda, Darry, Two-Bit, Everyone. I got a pretty bad headache I was torturing myself so bad. I was tossing and turning till about midnight when Soda got in bed. I pretended to be asleep but there were still a million thoughts racing through my mind. Then I pictured Cathy's little brother scared and disoriented lying in bed and I felt so bad for that kid that I forgot all about my troubles. I drifted off to sleep and woke up to Soda's alarm clock. It was a Sunday and he had to work half days on Sunday.

"Ahh… Damn-it Sodapop, Get ridda that thing" I groaned

"Hell, I would never wake up without it"

"At least turn it off?" And then he turned it off and I slept for an hour. I was thinking Darry was at church with his new girlfriend who's totally religious. Our Mother used to go to church every now and then, but none of us have ever been too religious.

Steve came by at noon and me and him went down to Buck's to take care of some business with Curly Shepard. I liked Curly quite a bit, but Steve was my buddy and I liked him more. Soda was at work so he couldn't help but I was a pretty good fighter myself. I wasn't exactly sure if this was going to be a fist fight and I prayed to god it wouldn't be. Darry was a lot less protective but he still didn't like me getting into too many fights. Curly upstairs in that bedroom where Dallas used to hang out. It smelled a bit like pot, I didn't know if Curly used though, Buck rented that room out to 3 different people. Curly, Tim, and some hippie named Richie.

Steve burst through that bedroom door to find Curly asleep on the ground. Steve grabbed his knife out of his pocket and flipped it open. I think Curly was drunk,

"Whadda you think you're doi—doing heeere?" he asked.

"I'm here to beat the hell out of you for snatching Evie away from me." I remained silent. I hated fights but Steve needed a buddy with him.

"She ain't your anymore." I think Curly almost passed out. "Sheeee—she ain't… ever gonna go back to y-youu" by now I was certain that guy was drunk. "She told me you beat her up all the time—I was going to get your ass ya know? I was. She wouldn't let me, I guess she cares about me too well" Curly wasn't too bright. He was trying to toy with Steve and if ya toy with Steve it don't make him too happy. Steve then kicked Curly in the head and Curly pulled out his butterfly knife he snatched from David Watson.

"If you don't break it off there's gonna be some trouble" Steve said. And he meant it too. I was scared to death Curly was gonna go tattle to Tim—I didn't wanna mingle with Tim when he was protecting Curly. Tim was a tough guy, he did love his siblings though.

"The trouble ain't with m—me Randle." Curly stood up and stuck his knife up to Steve's chin.

"Curly drop it" I said. I was pretty scared. I didn't wanna hurt anyone.

"You ain't my mom Curtis" Curly replied.

"Drop it Curly." I gulped. "Look, your gonna do something you're gonna regret. Drop the damn knife" Curly smacked Steve and started banging my head against the wall. It all went black and different shades of various colors filled my mind. I felt a panic for a few seconds then a warm mellow feeling covered my body head to toe.

I woke up in Steve's truck. Steve looked pretty freaked out. I knew it was probably because he thought Darry was gonna bust his head in for taking me along.

"Steve?"

"Hey kid. Pony, How are ya?"

"I feel okay I guess. Where's Shepard?"

"Buck threw him out. He threw me and you out also." He stared at me for a minute. "Ponyboy, will ya do me a favor and not mention this to Darry? He'd smack me silly"

"Don't worry I ain't gonna tell him. Hell, I hardly tell Darry anything" I laughed.

"Thanks man."

"Will ya take me home?"

"Sure." He drove for awhile and I fell asleep. Then he started shaking me and I made myself get up. I went inside and slept the rest of the day and woke up around 3 AM. My head was hurting, I reckon it was from the beating. I knew I had to go to school, what was I gonna tell Darrel? I was worried that Shepard would hunt Steve down—Curly and Tim. I stayed up for an hour and then fell asleep on the couch.


	7. Chapter 7: Closest thing to Gold

A few days passed and I wasn't quite sure what to feel. I was always tense--Nervous. My mind was filled with thoughts that just kept coming, one after another. I was worried all the time. Worried about getting beat up. With everything that happened last year, you'd think all the fightin' would stop by now. I guess some things never change. I was beginning to accept the fact that kids weren't gonna stop fighting, and there was nothin' I could do or say to change their mind. Hell, three kids were dead because of all that trash. Nothin' was gonna stop it.

Cathy and Me had been talking on the phone almost every night. We'd talk about everything. I began to ponder about the girls I'd talked to and how I felt about them. I remembered Cherry Valance, someone who I rarely thought of anymore. She'd turned into just another face in the hall. I remembered the way me and her talked about the sunset, about personal stuff I couldn't even talk to my own friends about, and compared it to me and Cathy. It was different. Maybe it was the way I felt when I talked to Cathy--It was just something different. Me and Cathy seemed to be inseperable lately, always talking, If we both couldn't get rides we'd walk home together, we could talk for hours.

On one particular walk home, Cathy said something out of the blue. She was like that sometimes.

"Ponyboy?"

"Yeah?" I replied.

"What'd you think of me when we first met?" She asked. I kind of panicked inside my mind. I wasn't too good with these kind of questions.

"Well," I began, apprehensively. "I guess I thought you were different." Her eyes questioned my comment.

"You knew what you wanted, and knew how to get it," I said, desperately hoping I didn't sound as dumb as I felt.

"Most chicks around here just can't make up their mind." I continued. "You weren't like that."

She looked at me with those big grey eyes. They were a beautiful color. I don't think I've seen hardly anyone with eyes that color.

"You know Ponyboy, I like you alot," she began. I was hoping the next word she said wasn't 'but.'

"But," she started. Oh no, I sighed. I was sweating bullets, expecting the worst.

"Sometimes the way you read me like a book scares me." she said in a matter-of-fact tone of voice. I sighed in relief. That couldn't be a bad thing, could it?

"Well, how about you then?" I questioned, not exactly sure what I was doing. "What was your first impression of me?"

"Nice," she started. "Quiet.. Maybe a bit shy. Which isn't usually my type. But Ponyboy, you have to understand that I was wrapped up in Bryon at that point. I didn't really give you much thought 'til after him. When you started talking to me that day... Not trying to pick me up. Not trying to score... But wanting to talk. That's when I realized that it wasn't such a bad thing that you were so shy. You're thoughtful. You actually... cared." she said softly. I could tell she meant every word, which had me feeling pretty good.

By this time I was feelin' pretty good. I haven't ever been this close to anyone, except Sodapop. Or maybe Johnny. But me and Cathy, seemed like we were set. Seemed like nothing could go wrong.


	8. Chapter 8: Bitter truth

One particular Monday morning, I got up real early. The sun was still rising, and I got a chance to look at it. Sunrises and sunsets I still liked, but they made me think of things I didn't wanna think about. Johnny--Everything that happened the year before. Sometimes I tried to shake off all feeling so nothing like that ever happened to me again. It never works--When you shake off all feeling, you leave behind the good along with the bad. There aren't any ups with out the downs. I couldn't keep up with that. As I was watching the sunset, Soda snuck up behind me and scared the heck out of me.

"Glory, Soda!" I said, still a bit startled. He grinned one of his famous grins at me.

"Seems Two-Bit is rubbin' off on everyone," I said sighing. I reached into my pocket for a ciggarette and began to light it. I'd gotten into the habit of smoking when I had alot on my mind. Seemed to help clear my mind.

"Watchin' the sun rise, Pony?" he asked, curiously. I merely nodded and sat down on the sofa.

"It's crazy how fast a year goes by..." Sodapop said.

"I don't know how we made it past this year. Johnny and Dal dyin' and all... They kept our gang together."

"It ain't much of a gang anymore," I said, sighing. Reflecting on the good old days.

"Steve and Two-Bit are still over here all the time but it ain't the same," I continued.

"Greasers are out. Gangs are out. Socs are out."I sighed. How could I miss the things I once despised more than anything?

"Hippies are in." Soda said for the both of us. "Hippies, and love, and colors," Soda continued.

"And drugs." I said, ending his statement. I thought of Cathy's kid brother M&M and how scared and confused he was all the time, and wondered what he was like before the drugs got to him. He didn't much look like a hippie. He had Cathy's same grey eyes, but in them were fear. They reminded me a little of the look Johnny always had in his eyes. I then thought of Mark, a guy I was buddies with who'd gotten sent to prison over drugs. It'd been a big mess. I liked Mark, he seemed to know a way out of anything. I wondered about Bryon though, Mark's best friend and Cathy's ex. He had it out for me a while back. Now it seemed he didn't know anyone was a life and was just coasting his way through life. I hadn't talked to him much. But since he was Cathy's ex it was normal to wonder every now and hten.

I got ready for school. Put on an old T-Shirt and Jeans. That's the way we dressed now. We didn't comb our hair back anymore either, and didn't use much grease. We let it fall on our foreheads, and when it got too long kicked it out of our eyes.

When I got to school I started walking down the hall--To my locker.

"Ponyboy!" I heard a farmiliar voice call.

I turned around, and to my surprise it was Cherry Valance. She was pretty as ever, and seemed happier than I remembered her being before.

I started walking towards her.

"Hi, Cherry."

She gave me a warm, awkward hug. I hadn't seen or talked to her in quite some time. I faintly wondered why now all of a sudden she was hugging me, and calling my name in the middle of the hall. Before, she never gave me a second glance out in public. I sighed, remembering that greasers and socs were out. That's the reason she was all pal-like now. She was allowed to be.

"How ya been keepin yourself?" She asked me.

I shrugged.

"Good enough." I said with a slight smile. I was a little bugged that she was wanting to talk now that it wouldn't hurt her. I didn't think of her as a friend, really. Just someone I used to know. Someone from my past, who didn't matter much anymore.

"I missed you!" She said.

"You could'a talked to me a million times." I said, hoping I didn't come off as bitter as I was feeling. "Why now?" I asked trying to sound as pleasant as I could.

"You know how it is..."

I shrugged. I felt bad for being so apathetic toward her. Here was a girl who obviously wanted to be friends. Her social status meant to much to her. It was now _in _for the rich kids to befriend the former greasers, and she took advantage of that. She still cared, but I couldn't let myself. I saw her for what she was: Someone who dreamed, cared, and hoped, but didn't have the guts to let anyone know that. That wasn't someone I could be around for very long.

I wondered why it took her so long to realize it was safe for us to talk now. The greaser/soc thing had died out quite some time ago. Maybe she just didn't know what to say.

I just sort of walked off. Haven't talked to her since. Cherry was a nice girl, but she couldn't stand up.


	9. Chapter 9: Too far

The next day me and Cathy went for a coke after school. We walked down to the drugstore, and as I pushed the glass doors open I saw Bryon Douglas standing there, flipping through a magazine.

Cathy looked a little worried and I hoped he wouldn't see us. I didn't wanna tangle with him.

Cathy always did have guts. She walked right up to him and said.

"Hi Bryon," He looked up at her. I took a look at Douglas. His eyes were tired and dull.

"Hey Cathy. Curtis. It's been awhile." He was trying to sound friendly, but it wasn't coming off too good. He didn't sound bitter; just apathetic, and awkward. It was a weird situation.

"How ya been Bryon?" I asked slowly.

He shrugged and looked up.

"I'm okay." He didn't seem to hate me anymore. I was surprised--He didn't seem to care. He used to be tough, outgoing, friendly, and a little wild. He always seemed like a smart guy. Now he seemed dead. Drained, maybe.

"How's M&M been?" he asked Cathy.

"He's not the same. I don't think he will be." Bryon's expression of mindless apathy shifted into a sick pale look for a brief second--Then shifted back into his prior expression.

"I'm sorry," he said trying to sound sincere. "I better be going. I'll see you guys around." Bryon said. He was gone and I looked at Cathy. She looked real sad. I sighed, hoping i didn't need to be jealous. Then I realized this: Even if Cathy did want Douglas back, he wouldn't take her. He wasn't the same guy he had been a year--Even a month ago. I wondered what it was like to have things change so drastically. But then I remembered my previous losses and started to realize how they were feeling.

On the walk back home Cathy didn't say much.

When we got back home M&M was sitting on her front porch. His head was down and he looked like he was about to bawl.

"M&M..." Cathy said.

"What's wrong honey?" 

He looked up at her and said in a slow shaky voice,

"Why can't I remember?" He started bawling outloud. He couldn't take it. Cathy sat there and cried with him, holding him close to her and I awkwardly put my arm around her. I didn't know what to do. After a few minutes, Cathy's dad came outside and told them to come in. He nodded at me as if to say thank you, and gave me a slight grin. I nodded and began walking home.

Cathy's house was about a half'a mile away from ours, in a slightly better side of town.

About a block away from home, a truck passed me. It's breaks screeched and it backed up.

"Ponyboy!" a voice screeched. It was Two-Bit in the truck.

"Pony get in!" I jumped in the truck quickly.

"Who's truck is this?" I asked.

Two-Bit was drunk--Out of control.

"One of Buck's new ones. He's lettin' me take it for a test run." Two-Bit said.

Buck Merill had an awful lot of trucks. He bought 'em, and sold them, sometimes kept them.

I began to get worried. Two-Bit was going awful fast, and it was getting dark, I could hardly see where we were going. The tension started to build up more and more, and Two-Bit started laughing harder and harder.

Suddenly I felt a strong force and I faintly saw the color red splattered all over the windshield.

My head hit against the dashboard hard, and I was out.


	10. Chapter 10: Hard to hear

When I woke up, I desperately tried to open my eyes. They wouldn't open. They felt as if they were glued shut. On the third or fourth try, I opened them.

I was in a room I recognized as a hospital room, and I glanced around. It was empty, and hot in there.

My eyes started to ache from being open, so I promptly shut them. I began to recollect what had happened-- Two-Bit... Was he okay? Questions filled my mind and I was about to go crazy if I didn't get some answers. But no one was in there. I tried to yell for someone, but it hurt terribly to open my mouth. All I could do was lay there. Body aching all over, and endless questions filling my head. It was awful.

I heard people talking outside the door.

"Just let me see him!" I heard a voice say.

I heard a sigh.

"Let me check on him first... Damn kids..."

I heard the door open, and I forced my eyes open. A doctor had walked in.

"Your awake?" he asked me.

Because I couldn't talk or nod, I sort of raised my eyebrows as if to say "Yes."

The doctor walked out side the door and said,

"Okay, you can see him."

Cathy walked in. She had a hurt worried look on her face.

Even though it desperately hurt, I couldn't help but smile. She broke into tears.

"We didn't know... what was gonna happen..." She began.

"Do you remember what happened?" She asked me.

I slightly nodded and forced two words out of my mouth.

"Two-Bit..."

"He's okay." She said.

"He's just fine. But... When you jumped in that truck. Two-Bit was drunk... Really drunk."

I tried to nod again, as if to say "I know."

"You guys hit a car," a wave of fear flew over me and Cathy started talking too fast.

"There were three people in it. A wife, a husband, and a four year old boy..." If I wasn't in so much physical pain, I would have broken down and cried.

"The two parents are O.K. but... the boy... They don't know if he's gonna make it."

I kind of yelped. I didn't mean to, it just came out of my mouth.

"Two-Bit might go to prison." She said in a quick desperate voice. I couldn't hold it in anymore. I didn't care how bad it would hurt, or if I would look like a softy, I started to softly cry.

Good old fun-loving Two-Bit. Two-Bit that wouldn't hurt anyone, except for in a rumble. Two-Bit who could make anyone laugh... Two-Bit who could make anyone smile and forget their worries... Might be locked up. For what could be a long time.

Cathy pushed her behind her ears and said.

"I'll tell your brothers you're awake, they've been awfully worried."

Before she was out of the room I had fallen asleep again. I couldn't deal with this. Not now.


End file.
